


Just A Little Chaotic

by winterxevans



Category: Captain America (Movies), Chris Evans - Fandom, Evanstan - Fandom, Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, Sebastian Stan - Fandom, Stucky - Fandom, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Winter Soldier (Comics)
Genre: Actor Chris Evans, Actor Sebastian Stan, Affairs, Drama, Drama & Romance, Evanstan - Freeform, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Friendship, Long-Term Relationship(s), Love, Love Triangles, Multi, Other, Sebastian Stan - Freeform, Sex, Stucky - Freeform, chris evans - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-10
Updated: 2019-07-16
Packaged: 2020-04-24 01:35:51
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 17,709
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19163134
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/winterxevans/pseuds/winterxevans
Summary: Alison, a singer-songwriter and an actress, finds herself in a middle of a chaotic set up with two of her cast mates.Chris was a breath of fresh air for her. She met him on set and immediately created a connection but her long history with Sebastian makes it all complicated.





	1. Forgetting Something

“And… cut!” I hear the director’s voice and a huge grin crept on my face. I was standing in front of Chris Evans, as Steve Rogers, sitting on his motorcycle. He was smiling brightly at me as I removed my black fingerless leather gloves.

“That’s all for today, everyone. That’s a wrap! Thank you very much!” The director announced. Everyone around us started on thanking each other and hugging each other for a successful shoot but I kept still on my stance.

“Why are you looking at me like that?” I smirked at him. He got off his motorcycle and shook his head.

“Seems like you’re forgetting something,” He replied and took off his brown leather jacket. I furrowed my eyebrows in response. _What did I forget? The hell is he talking about?_ He placed his hand softly on my shoulder and leaned in to my ear. “It’s the last day of filming and you owe me a date.”

My eyes grew wide as I watched him walk away from me. My assistant handed me a bottle of water and guided me back to my trailer. I was silent until I plopped myself at the couch.

“Okay, you’ve been extremely silent… What did Mr. America tell you?” Joelle, my assistant and my best friend, sat down beside me. She raised her perfectly shaped eyebrows at me as she awaited my response.

“Remember when we started filming and Chris wouldn’t stop bugging me – asking me to go out with him?” I said.

“Yeah, and being the idiot that you are, you kept saying no.” She sassed at me.

“Well I told him that once we wrapped the movie, I’ll go to one date with him,” I held up one finger to emphasize my point. “And apparently I forgot that today is the last day.” A huge smile formed on Joelle’s face and she started cheering and pulling me up the couch.

“Bitch! Finally!!! You’re going on a date with another man!” She said as she dragged me to my makeup chair across the couch. Right on time, my makeup artist Brett, came in my trailer and Joelle instantly beamed at him. “Guess what, B? Our girl’s finally going on a date!”

“Oh Lord, finally you got over your stupid ex!” Brett overdramatically exclaimed being the diva that he is. I just smiled and shook my head as I started to get myself out of my black denim jacket. I’ve been single for a couple of months now and the last man I ever dated was my childhood lover, Peter. He was my first love and we first dated when I was 16 though we had an on and off relationship when I started studying in New York. Then when we were both 22, we got back together and after 3 years he asked me to marry him.  Though it all ended when I found him with a girl in our hotel room just a few months after the engagement.

“Looks like Mr. America’s excited.” Joelle handed me my phone with a text notification from Chris.

**_I know you’re tired today, take a rest and we’ll have our date tomorrow. I’ll pick you up at 7pm?_ **

I smiled at his text and immediately typed my response.

                **_So considerate of you, Evans. Alright, see you tomorrow at 7._** ** _😊_**

I spent my night lazily, I watched whatever was on the TV and I slept until noon. I checked my phone and there was a message from Joelle and my mother. I checked my mom’s message first, it was the typical “How are you, honey?” and I just replied that I just finished filming yesterday. Then, I checked Joelle’s message.

                **_Mr. America wants to give you something, text me if you’re awake._**

I replied and in just a few minutes, I heard my door knocking. I threw on a robe over my pajamas a.k.a an old oversized t-shirt and answered the door. A huge bouquet of red roses greeted me with Joelle behind it. “Good morning, pancake!” she cheered and let herself in then placed the roses on the table. “I know you’re not a fan of flowers but you gotta give the guy some props, this is amazing.” She said as she admired the flowers.

“I don’t know, Jo. It seems like he puts a lot of effort for just one date.” I said as I touched some of the petals of the roses. “You know it has only been 6 months.”

“Come on, Alison. Nobody’s keeping track.” She placed her hands on her waist and looked straight at me. “Just have fun, Ali. Nothing’s – wait. I though you already moved on?”

“I have,” I replied. “It’s just I’m afraid – God, I’m gonna sound like a pussy – I’m afraid to get hurt.”

“Ali, stop being negative.” Joelle cooed. “Give this a chance and if it all turns to shit, you can make an album out of it.” She teased and I can’t help but to giggle. Joelle and Brett helped me to get ready for my date with Chris. I wore a short emerald green bodycon dress and black pumps. At exactly 7pm, Chris picked me up and we went straight to the car waiting for us in front of the hotel.

“I know I’ve said this a couple of times, but you look so fucking great.” Chris giggled and rubbed his face as he turned red. I covered my face with my palms as I felt my cheeks fire up.

“Well you look great as well,” I placed a hand on his knee and I admired his navy blue suit. The car ride to the restaurant was fun. We talked about the basic things you talk about when you’re in a date. Where are you from? How many siblings do you have? Just the getting to know basics. When we arrived at the restaurant we were seated a little far away from the people. It was a little too fancy for my liking but hey, so far, I’m having a good time.

“So, you went to Julliard?” Chris asked with a smirk as he took a sip of his drink.

“Yeah, but my twin brother studied at Rutgers.” I replied.

“Why is that? He didn’t get in?” He asked then took a bite of his steak.

“Nah, he was qualified to get in just didn’t like some of the snobby people there. I had more patience than him.” I joked and he chuckled in response as he cuts another piece of his steak. “Actually, he went there with a person you know.”

“Really?” he raised his eyebrow and placed the piece of meat in his mouth. “Who?”

“Sebastian Stan.” I answered and he looked at me completely frozen.  


	2. Keep In Touch

“Really? Sebastian?” He said and continued eating. His face was a mixture of shock and amusement. At the moment, I didn’t really know what to feel. _Should I be upset that Seb didn’t talk about me with Chris? Or maybe he **did** say something? Should I be worried at Chris’ reaction?_  I took a sip as I waited if Chris was going to say anything. “He didn’t tell me that – I’m actually surprised,” He started to laugh “It’s such a small world, am I right?”

“Yeah, I know.” I giggled and continued to tell a short story about my friendship with Sebastian. “Well actually, it’s my brother and Seb who’s close since they both went to Rutgers. He was also our roommate for a few years.”

“Do you guys still talk?” Chris leaned back on his chair and his blue eyes stared into mine.

“Not really, since were both really busy.” I answered. _I better change this topic._ “You know what, enough about Sebastian… Tell me about more about you.” I leaned forward to him and rested my chin on my hand. Chris giggled in response and leaned forward too.

“What do you wanna know?” Chris smirked at me. _God, he’s beautiful_.

“So, in all of our castmates, who do you find most interesting?” I purred at him and giggled. I spotted his free hand on the table and I softly placed my hand above it.

“Well, other than RDJ,” he chuckled, and his voice was deep as he started his answer. “In all honesty, it was actually you.” Shivers went down to my spine and I can feel my cheeks turn red. “You baffled me the first day I saw you at the table read. You were sitting across me wearing that large blue sweater and it only made me think how good you would look when you’re wearing mine.” Somehow my breath escaped my body and I felt his warm hand interlock with mine. I wanted to devour him immediately on this table. Before I could even give him a flirty reply, my phone rang. I took it out from my bag and it was my brother.

“It’s my brother, I gotta take this.” I said and answered the call.

“Hey there, sis!” My brother slurred into the phone. I look at Chris as he signaled the waiter for the bill. “Are you already back in LA?”

“I’ll be back this weekend,” I was distracted by the noise on the other line. I assumed that he was in a party and rolled my eyes at the thought. “What do you want, Adam?”

“Nah, nothing… not – that’s good! Yeah, that’s good. We gotta get back rehearsing, you’re gonna be back on the road in a couple of weeks.” Somehow even when he is drunk, my brother still can talk about performing. It’s one of the reasons why he’s my musical director. “By the way, I’m with Sebastian right now, he’s in town until tomorrow.” I immediately can hear Sebastian’s loud drunk voice in the background.

“Okay, you guys have fun. Please don’t do anything stupid. I’ll be back in two days. We’ll start rehearsals once I get back. Love you, A.” I put my phone back in my bag and playfully swatted Chris’ hand. “Hey! That’s no fair! You didn’t let me fight you for the bill.”

“It’s okay, I asked for the date, I must pay.” He said as he stood up and offered his hand to me. I took his hand and we both walked out of the restaurant and went back straight to the car. We spent the night driving around the city and we just kept talking about life, dreams, and Disney. It was around 2am when Chris and I were headed back to hotel.

“You’re right, you’re right. Mulan is pretty badass.” Chris gave up after our banter about who was the best Disney princess.

“Hey! Mulan saved China plus Shang was really hot.” I answered, and he laughed in response. After a few minutes, we both realized that we were already in front of the hotel. Chris offered to walk me up to my suite. We were like high school kids giggling at everything. Once we reached my door we faced each other, looking deeply at each other’s eyes. I stepped in closer and placed my hand on his chest then Chris placed his hands around my waist.

“I had a lot of fun,” I purred at him and he smirked at him. His face inched closer and in less than a second our lips met and came crashing each other. Chris kissed me like he needed me, as if I was lost and came back to him. His soft lips find its way to my neck as he pinned me against the door.

“Chris,” I moaned and his grip around my waist moved down to my ass. _Keep a hold of yourself, Ali_. A bunch of thoughts came into my head all of a sudden. “Chris, wait.” He stopped and rested his forehead against mine. “I’m sorry, it’s just – you know, I’ll be on tour and I’ll be busy. If we did do this…” I took a deep breath and placed my hands on his face. “Look, I’m not saying no. This night was completely amazing, and you are wonderful. I’m just saying let’s take it slow.”

“I understand,” Chris nodded his head and gently placed a soft kiss on my lips. “We’ll keep in touch while you’re on tour, then let’s see what will happen.” He offered.

“Well I still got two days here, you want to make the most out of it?” I smirked at him and opened the door to my suite. He followed me, and his eyes were hungry for me. I lead him to the bed and he placed himself on top of me. He kissed me deeply and passionately. His hands wandering around my body. I pulled off his coat and threw it somewhere away.

“Are you good?” He asked.

“Yeah, I’m on birth control, don’t worry.” I answered. He zipped down my dress and slid it down my body. He stopped kissing me and took off his shirt then I unclasped my black lace bra.

“Oh fuck,” he groaned, and his mouth went straight to my breasts. He planted soft kisses and sucked on my nipples. His fingers softly tugged on my panties and he proceeded to play with me. It was euphoric, and he kept me on the edge. His mouth pleasured my pussy and my moans filled the room. I didn’t care if the whole floor would hear me, he was too good. He made sure each stroke made my knees weak and made me gasping for air.

 “Fuck me, please. Now.” I begged, and he complied quickly. He took off my shoes then his bottoms. He entered me slowly, stretching me with pleasure. He started with a slow pace and then he started to speed up little by little. “Faster.” I said breathily, and I gripped his arms as he picked up his pace. His mouth crashed into mine concealing my cries. It didn’t take long for me to explode under him. My body was in waves and I was lost in the moment. I was in heaven, and I felt like I was on a swing just swinging up. Chris buried his face on my neck as he pulled out and he came in me. He planted a kiss on my forehead and he plopped down beside me.

We continued on until the sun rose up and slept. I woke up without Chris on my bed. _Fuck. Look what have you done now, Ali._ I shook my head and sat up. I pulled my robe from the chair near the bed and wrapped myself with it. The silk was touching my skin gently and reminded me of Chris’ touch last night. I rummaged through my bag which was on the floor and got out my phone. 4 text messages and 2 missed calls and it was all from Sebastian.

                **_Wher aree you?_**

**_We ned to hang ot soon_ **

**_Noticeee me_ **

**_I miss you,,._ **

“Hey there, you.” Chris’ voice shocked me, and I slid my phone in the pocket of my robe. “How are you? I took a shower, I didn’t want to wake you so…” He said as he sat on the edge of the bed. He was wearing nothing but a white cotton robe from the hotel bathroom.  

“I’m okay, I’m starving – kind of.” I chuckled and stood in front of him. “I’ll go shower and then we’ll eat?” Chris nodded his head and I went straight to the bathroom. I opened up my phone again and stared at Sebastian’s texts. He last texted me almost a month ago and we haven’t spoken since. _What does he want?_


	3. Little More Care

It was already 5pm and I was still in my hotel room with Chris, both of us still wearing our robes. We just ordered room service to fill us up. Chris was on the bed as he was watching the news. His face was scrunched up with mild annoyance and distaste because of the horrible news that was airing. I sat beside him and placed my hand on his lap. He was still fixed on the TV, his eyebrows furrowed, nose scrunched up and lips pouted.

“Hey,” I cooed at him. “I have to pack… Joelle just sent me my flight details, it changed, and I have to leave early tomorrow.” Chris looked at me and pouted even more. _Don’t do that, you dummy. You look too cute._

“When can I next see you?” Chris asked sweetly.

“Oh, so you’re thinking of a second date now, huh?” I joked at him. _God, I’m gonna miss him_. “I’m gonna be gone for a year and a few months. It’s my first headlining tour and it means a lot to me. I really have to focus, y’know… and last night,” worriedness filled Chris’ face as I continued with my sentence. “Honestly, it was so fun, and you are so sweet and amazing but it’s…” it was hard for me to find the words to say. I took a deep breath and held both of his hand. “I enjoyed my time with you, Chris. And if I could do it every night, I would but I have to focus.”

“Are you – are you ghosting me?” Chris asked exaggeratedly making me laugh.

“Ghosting you is when I’m going to stop talking to you out of the blue. What I’m trying to say is that,” I scooted closer to him and he wrapped his arms around me. “Let’s take this real slow, we’ll keep in touch while I’m gone and when I get back, let’s go back to where we left off.” I planted soft kisses on his lips and he laid back as I rested my body on top of him. “Sounds good?”

“Sounds nice.” He smiled and kissed me deeply. Before things started to get heavier, I got up from the bed and pulled up Chris.

“With that being said, I have to fix my stuff. I have a flight early tomorrow.” I placed my hands on my waist.

“Are you kicking me out?” Chris stood up and mimicked my stance.

“Is this not the first time, huh, Evans?” I teased him, and he smirked in response. I wrapped my arms around his neck and he placed his hands on my waist. “Don’t you have work too?”

“You’re funny,” He kissed my forehead, both sides of my cheeks, my nose then my lips. “And yes, I have a film to shoot soon but I’ll go back in Boston next week.”

“You can see me when I come to Boston, you can come to the show.” I offered.

“Only if I get free tickets.” He smiled and kissed me deeply.

Chris stayed for a little while since he helped me to pack. As soon as we were done he left and let me rest. Chris and I became close while we were filming, and he always offered a hand to me. He cared for everybody, but he was more caring towards me – as pointed out by RDJ. I remember when we were on set for Avengers, we were filming the scene where all of us are in the helicarrier. We were in the huge table discussing about Loki, I was sitting between Scarlett and Chris, with a chair in between each of us, Robert and Mark are behind me, and Hemsworth is standing across us. That day I wasn’t feeling well, I had a cold and I had a lot of phone meetings earlier the day for my tour, so my head was pounding with pain. Playing a superhero with healing powers was ironic to me now.

I found it difficult for me to keep up with the scene even though I just had a few lines. I was messing up the whole day, and it annoyed the hell out of me. Every time I messed up Chris would give me a reassuring smile and cheer me on. His enthusiastic energy helped me get through the scene. Once the director said cut, I slouched down on my seat as everyone were packing up for lunch.  

“You alright, Angel?” Scarlett called me with my character’s name. The Dark Angel, Gabriela Stark, once a HYDRA experiment and now an Avenger.

“I’m going to die in a few minutes, I can feel it.” I shook my head in response and I gave her a faint smile. She rubbed my shoulders to comfort me and left to get her lunch. I looked at Chris who was in a conversation with Robert. Chris was whispering to Robert then in response, Robert gave him a huge smile, two thumbs up and then walked away.

As I stood up from my chair, Chris walked towards me. “Seems like you and Robert have a little secret.” I teased at him.

“It’s nothing,” he said. “Do you want me to walk with you to your trailer?” he offered just like the gentleman that he is.

“Are you still going to ask me about that date?” I raised my eyebrow at him. Chris grinned and shook his head as if I caught him with his plan. I never said no to him. He was persistent in asking but not to the point that he was annoying, but I just roll my eyes at him every time he asks.

“You know what they say, never say never but hey – you’re sick and I worry about you. I just – I don’t,” Chris stuttered as he finds his way through his sentence. I tapped him on his arm to stop him struggling.

“Alright, you can walk with me but don’t ask me about the date while we’re on our way, okay?” I told him, and he grinned like a little kid. To my relief, he never mentioned anything about his request while walking. He told me the crazy story of how he fell face flat on the floor while doing some stunts on the first Captain America movie which made me laugh hard.

“I was ridiculous, I looked like a drunk man passed out on the floor.” He laughed out loud and I clutched at his arm since I was laughing too hard. When we reached my trailer, I stood in front of the door facing Chris. “Are you not going to let me in?” he teased.

“No, go to your own trailer, Evans.” I teased back. He chuckled and placed his hand on his chest.

“That hurt, Ali.” He joked. “Anyway, before I go… about that date…” I rolled my eyes at him in response and shook my head. “Hey! You told me that I can’t ask you while we’re on our way and now we’re here, so…”

“Such a smartass, Christopher.” I said sarcastically and gently pushed him. “Later, Evans.” I waved at him and went in my trailer, leaving him behind. When I got in, my attention was drawn to the table filled with various types of tea and a clear glass tea brewer. Joelle was sitting on the chair next to the table with a smirk and a note card in her hand.

“Mr. America’s something, Ali.” She said as she passed the note to me. Right when I saw who the note was from, my heart fluttered.

                **_Alison,_**

**_I heard you like to drink tea when you’re sick._ **

**_Get well soon, Angel._ **

**_\- Chris_ **

**_P.S: I had some help with RDJ._ **

I took my phone which was on the dresser near the table and texted Chris. _Joelle’s right, Mr. America’s something._

                **_Here’s the deal, I’ll go on a date with you once we wrap. I guess you’re not bad, Evans._**

I looked at the different teas that were laid out on the table. Green tea, Barley tea, Earl Grey, Chamomile, and so much more. I picked out the green tea and asked Joelle to help me brew it. I typed another text to send to Chris. I wanted to thank him and at the same time tease him.

                **_Thank you for the surprise. I guess you’re cute now._**

“Who am I kidding, he’s always cute.” I said to myself as I read back my messaged that I just sent.

“You say something?” Joelle asked, and I shook my head in response. Chris makes it hard for me not to fall for him and I love it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have an on going fic about the character the OFC is playing, here's the link: https://elevatorsnot-worthy.tumblr.com/buckyfics


	4. Flashback, Forget it

2004\. I’m in my second year of college and I was on the verge of breaking down. I was so stressed with college, and I was always reminded that I was not enough. The voice of my professor telling me that I will never reach anything kept replaying back on my head. I sat on the window sill as I watched the view of New York and its busy people. I was alone in my room, or that’s what I thought.

“Hey, wanna grab some food?” Sebastian swung my bedroom door open. He looked like he had a bad day. His hair was extremely messy, his shirt was a little wrinkled, and his face got and extra pout. Sebastian has been living with us for 8 months now and ever since he moved in, he and I became closer. Even though he was friend with my brother, initially.

“You okay?” I hugged my legs to my chest and Sebastian walked in. He was shaking his head as he sat beside me.

“I’m just tired,” He just facepalmed himself and sighed. “Anyway, it seems like you’re not in a good mood too. So, let’s go get some food.” Seb stood up and reached out to me.

“But I don’t wanna go out,” I said softly. Sebastian looked at me and took a deep breath. He placed his hands on my cheeks and kissed my forehead.

“Alright, I’ll buy some food and some beer,” he offered. “Then we’ll watch some Star Wars, sounds good?”

Halfway through the movie, both Seb and I were tipsy and full of Chinese food. I rested my head on the throw pillow that was propped on Sebastian’s lap. Watching movies in the living room has been a regular occurrence every time one of us had a bad day.

“You’re a good guy, Sebastian.” I randomly said to him. “Thanks for all of this.” I gestured to the empty bottles of beer filled the floor and Chinese take out boxes filled the coffee table in front of us.

“I just don’t want to see you sad, Ali.” Sebastian’s response threw me off. I don’t know if it was the alcohol or it was really my emotions. “Anything for you.” My heart skipped a beat at his voice.  _This can’t be, Sebastian’s my friend. Sebastian’s just my friend._  I felt drawn to him all of a sudden and I sat up. Sebastian’s gaze was fixed to the TV, but his cheeks were red.

“Hey,” I whispered at him and he slowly turned to me. I can’t even recall how it started but I remembered how it felt. Sebastian’s lips found mine and he was on top of me. It felt wrong, but I can’t help it.  _What the fuck am I doing?_  My heart was melting with his kisses. Sebastian breathes heavily as he kisses me more. As soon as we heard the main door open, Sebastian leaped up and I quickly sat up.

“Everything alright?” It was my twin brother, Adam. It seems like he didn’t see me and Sebastian practically eating each other’s faces a few seconds ago.

“Yeah, we thought there was a bug.” I muttered my stupid excuse, but Adam looked like he believed it though. “We’ll never talk about that ever again.” I hissed at Sebastian.

“Don’t worry, it’s nothing.” He said with his hands up.

“Correct, it’s nothing.” I assured. To this day, Sebastian and I never mentioned that moment, but I know we both remember it.

I was on the way to the airport to kickstart my tour in San Francisco. It has been two and a half weeks since my date with Chris and I can’t wait for the next one. Chris called me earlier to say good luck, but he had to go since he was also on his way to shoot his new movie. I was about to take a nap but my phone rang again. It was Sebastian.

“Hey, why are you ignoring me?” Sebastian’s tone was filled with concern.  _Oh shit, I totally forgot to reply to him._

“Hey Seb, I’m sorry. I was busy. Right after Avengers, I went back straight to rehearsals.” I told him.

“It’s okay, Ali. I understand.” Sebastian sounded a little sad then he cleared his throat and continued to talk. “Anyway, I want to just say good luck and I am so proud of you. I bought tickets to your San Diego show, and I can’t wait to see you.” Sebastian’s voice was filled with enthusiasm. A wave of energy hits my body.

“Wait, what?” I muttered in disbelief. “But I thought you’re back in New York?”

“Yeah, I’ll fly to San Diego to see you.” He said matter-of-factly. “I was supposed to see you on your first show, but I had to go back in New York for work – come on Al, it’s like I haven’t done outrageous things for you.” I rolled my eyes in response.

“Alright, alright! We better get drinks right after, okay?” I said before I get to remember the shenanigans we did before.

“Of course! I gotta go now, I’m gonna be late. I’ll see you in a few days, Ali-bear!” He chimed.

“See you, Sebby-boy.” I said, and he ended the call. My brother, who was sitting beside me, turned to me with a face of disgust.

“You’re still using those disgusting nicknames?” he uttered sourly.

“It’s none of your business, Adam.” I rolled my eyes at him.

***

I sang the last note for the show and as soon the set finishes, I went backstage and received a lot of congratulatory cheers from my crew. After giving everyone thanks and hugs, I immediately went back to my dressing room. I changed to a new pair of clothes, a pair of ripped jeans and a vintage Star Wars t-shirt since Sebastian and I agreed that he’ll come to me after the show. I plopped down the leather couch, as I waited for Sebastian to come here. Joelle approached me and handed me my phone that was buzzing.  _It was Chris_.

“Hey, you called right on time.” I smiled into the phone as I answered the call.

“I got lucky,” Chris chuckled. “How was the show?”

“It was great! I almost forgot my lyrics, but I had fun.” I joked, and he laughed in response. “How about you? How was your day?”

“I was really distracted earlier, I can’t get my lines right,” He said.

“I’m guessing you have a cute leading lady?” I teased at him and he giggled.

“No, no!” His laughter got louder. “I don’t know – nevermind, it’s embarrassing.” He said.

“Come on! Tell me, please!” I pleaded like a kid asking for candy from his mom.

“Fine, fine. I’ll tell you…” Chris voice was soft. He muttered some words that I was unable to understand. He took a deep breath and continued talking. “I kept imagining that she was you and you make me nervous so, I don’t know – it’s sounds so stupid so please act like I didn’t say anything. I sound ridiculous,” as I listened to Chris rambled on, a knock on the door distracted me. I walked towards the door and slowly opened it.

“Hey, Ali-bear.” Sebastian greeted me with a wide tooth grin. I stared blankly to Sebastian’s face then to the brown teddy bear in his arms. Chris’ voice faded as I stood frozen at the door. The teddy bear was as long as Sebastian’s torso and it has a small guitar hanging from its body.

“You probably hated what I said,” Chris’ voice snapped me back to reality.

“No, I don’t. It’s actually sweet and funny,” I said softly on the phone. Sebastian’s face faded and his eyebrows furrow. “Hey, I gotta go, I’ll call you back when I get back in the hotel.” I said, and I ended the call.

“Who was that?” Sebastian asked.

“It – it was Chris,” I didn’t know why but it felt hard to answer that simple question to Sebastian.

“Oh,” Sebastian stepped back and shook his head. “Anyway, I got this for you.” Sebastian handed me the teddy bear. My lips formed in to a bright smile as I held the teddy bear in my hands. I leaped into Sebastian’s arms and gave him a hug.

“Thank you so much, Seb!” He lifted me from the ground and held me tightly.

“You were amazing, Ali. I’m so proud of you.” He whispered in to my ear as he spun me around. Sebastian gently put me back to my feet and his wide grin was back. “So, let’s go get some drinks?” he offered.

“Yeah, let’s wait for Adam,” I said.

“Oh, no. Adam’s not coming. He has a date with Eloise.” He said.

“Okay, so I guess it’s just you and me then? Just like old times?” I smiled at him.

“Just like old times.” He nodded.

We went to the nearest bar we would find. We were seated on a booth in the corner of the bar and ordered beer, chili fries, and nachos. I listened to Sebastian as he told stories of the projects he did. It was the first time we saw each other since I started filming for Avengers. It was always a joy to see Sebastian talk about his work because it shows how passionate he is in everything he does.

“What about you? How was Avengers?” he asked me then took a piece of nachos.

“It was great, I had to do some fight scenes which was very new to me, but it was  _hella_  fun!” I beamed at him.

“Did you make friends?” Sebastian asked as he took a gulp from his beer.

“Yes, dad. I made friends,” I answered him sarcastically. I lit up as Chris’ face flashed in my brain. I automatically started talking about him. “Everyone was nice. Chris was really sweet—”

“Oh, Chris Evans? Is he the guy you were talking to earlier?” Sebastian teased. He smirked at me as he ate some fries.

“Yeah, we actually went on a date.” I answered, and Sebastian started coughing. “Are you okay?” Sebastian just nodded and chugged down his beer.

“I’m okay.” He said as he heaved for his breath. “You went on a date with him?”

“Yeah, Peter’s dating the girl he cheated on me with, so I think it’s just okay for me to date other people, right?” I shrugged and ate some fries.

“Yeah – no, no. You’re right, there’s nothing wrong with that.” He said softly.

“You worked with Chris, so you know that he’s a nice guy.” I told him as I watch his shoulders slowly fall.

“Yeah, he is.” Sebastian said bitterly and looked at his drink.

“Well it’s not like he’s my boyfriend already, we’re just seeing how things go since I’m still on tour.” I said, and Sebastian did not respond. “Are you okay, Seb?”

Sebastian cleared his throat and said, “Yeah, I’m okay. I just remembered that you probably have an early morning tomorrow. I probably have to bring you back to the hotel.” His voice was monotone. I didn’t understand his sudden change of mood. I used to talk to him about the guys I dated before, and he would listen. This time his reaction was different, he used to make fun of the guys I dated. Sebastian offered to walk me back to the car that was waiting outside, and I said yes, ending the night immediately. After I paid for the bill, Sebastian walked behind me. I can feel the immediate drop in him, but I can understand why.

  _Sebastian’s POV_

I felt like a dumbass as I walked behind Alison.  _Why does it have to be Chris?_  I flew all the way from New York to San Diego just to see her. I wanted to hate at her, but I can’t. It’s Alison. My heart is too weak to even feel the slightest annoyance towards her. When we reached her car, I opened the door for her. I watched her as she climbed in. Her long brown curly hair bounced with every move she made. She looked at me with a slight frown on her face.

“Do you want a ride?” she asked me. Her brown eyes made my heart soft. It always did.

“No, I’m staying at a different hotel, it’s out of your way.” I lied.

“Okay. Take care, Seb.” She said softly.

“Take care, Alison.” I said and then I closed the car door. I watch as the car drove away from me.

I never thought I would be falling for her. She’s my best friend’s sister, for God’s sake. I tried to fight it for years, but I can never forget how my whole world stopped the moment I first laid eyes on her. Even though I dated other girls, I always find myself at her feet. I went back to the bar and ordered something stronger. Even though she said Chris was not her boyfriend, I saw how much her eyes lit up when she mentioned his name. She was like that when she was with Peter, before everything they had went to shit.

“Hey, you alright?” a blonde woman sat beside me. “You’ve been staring at your drink for a while now.”

I shook my head and responded to her, “I flew all the way from New York to tell this girl that I like her for a long time.” My words just came out due to the alcohol getting the best of me.

“I’ll guess, she already has a boyfriend?” she asked. I shook my head still not looking at the woman beside me.

“She’s talking to this guy, and I know by the end of the year he’ll be her boyfriend.” I said and took a shot of my drink. I just realized that I’ve done 6 shots.  _My God._

“Aren’t you going to convince her?” she asked.

“Nope, I promised myself to never get in the way.” I said. I gave her some space after her breakup with Peter. I also did not want to take advantage of her vulnerability. “You know what, forget about it. I think we’re just better off as friends.” I muttered but I never meant a single word I said. I faced the woman beside me and introduced myself. “I’m Sebastian,” I reached out my hand to her.

“Heather,” she said as she shook my hand softly. She leaned into my ear and whispered, “Come on, I’ll show you a good time.”


	5. Drawn

“Thank you, Boston! I love you very much!” I said into the microphone and my band and I took our bow. We are already nearing the end of the American leg of my tour. I’ll have a week off then we’re off to start our Europe and Asia leg. I looked at my left and standing on the side of the stage was Chris, keeping himself hidden behind the curtains. He showed me a bright smile and two thumbs up. I looked back at the crowd as they cheered, and I waved them my goodbye then ran to Chris.

“You were amazing!” He greeted me with a huge bear hug. After my tiring performance, I left comforted and recharged in his arms. “Let’s go?” he said, and I nodded then we walked back to the dressing room. During my tour, Chris would call me everyday and talk to me as much as he can. We are like teenagers that would talk to each other until we fall asleep with our phones in our hands. Even when I’m getting my hair and makeup done, we would call each other on Skype.

“Finally, I can finally do this again.” Chris said and kissed me on my lips as he shuts the door of my dressing room behind him. I missed the taste of his lips and I can’t help but to devour him. We moved towards the couch and Chris gently pushes me down. He laid on top of me and kissed me from my lips to my neck. He didn’t care that I was a mess after my concert. I knew he wanted me in any way possible. Chris took every piece of clothing I had and threw it on the floor.

“I missed you so much.” Chris whispered in my ear as his hand roamed my body. From my neck, to my waist, to my legs. Chris’ touch was gentle but was electric to me. He played with my nipples with his other hand and his mouth. I can’t help but to moan.

“God, Chris I need you. Now.” I whined as I pulled on his belt. Chris took of his white sweater and I got up and pushed him down so he’s lying on his back. I took off his belt and pulled down his pants with his boxers. His member sprung out all stiff. I licked the shaft to the tip and Chris groaned in response. I took his length into my mouth and slowly moved up and down.

“Ali,” Chris groaned, and he gently placed his hand on my head. I sucked him harder and faster. Chris started to moan louder. I loved how he was vocal, and he didn’t hold back his moans. “Deeper, Ali. Come on, I know you can take it.” He said as he guided me down his length. It took me a while to take in his full length. Not only he was long, his girth made it a little difficult for me to take it all in my mouth. Chris’ gripped tightly on my hair as I moved faster up and down his shaft. As I moved up, I kiss his tip.

“You like that?” I said and licked his shaft.

“I’ll like it better when you’ll ride me.” He smirked, and I quickly positioned myself on top of him. Chris placed his hand on my mound, feeling my wetness. “I see you are already ready for me,” He then placed his hands on my waist as he guided me down as he slowly enters me.

“Oh fuck,” I moaned as I rode him slowly. I felt euphoric with every move I make. I propped my hand on his broad shoulders and changed to a faster pace. Our breaths got shorter as we both reach our peak. Chris rubbed my clit with his thumb, making me weak. My legs twitched as I came involuntarily. Chris flipped us over and just started pounding in me. I gripped on his large arms as I lose control under him.

“Fuck!” Chris said to himself as he released his load in me. I placed my hand on his cheek as we both catch our breaths. Chris kissed me deeply and said, “I love you.” My heart skipped a beat after what he said. His blue eyes stared into me. A huge smile crept on my face. “I love you. I am madly in love with you. Ever since I saw you on set, I knew I gotta have you in my life. It’s just – It’s crazy.” He shook his head as he finds the words he’s going to say next. His eyes sparkled as he looked at me straight in the eyes with sincerity, with care, _with love_. I felt safe in his eyes, but I was still consumed by my past. I was scared to trust somebody again. I was scared to let myself love someone again but with him, I’m excited to take the leap.

“I love you too, Chris.” I whispered. His face lit up and he started kissing me all over my face. “Now, let’s get dressed before they see us here.”

After we got dressed up, we went out of the dressing room to go to the car that was waiting for us. I changed into a much more comfortable outfit. Slip-on shoes, black jeans, a gray jacket, and a white t-shirt underneath. We went straight to the car and to the hotel. Even though I need to be up early tomorrow, Chris and I went to the hotel’s cocktail lounge.

“Will you stay the night?” I asked Chris as I took a sip of my daiquiri. We were seated on the stools at the bar, both facing each other. He took a sip of his drink and he smirked at me.

“Do you want me to?” he smiled and leaned closer. I kissed his soft lips and held Chris’ face. I rubbed my thumb across Chris’ soft beard which really looked great on him.

“I’d love it if you would stay the night.” I whispered in between kisses. There weren’t too many people in the lounge, so we didn’t care about being too showy. I pulled away from the kiss and smiled at him. “But I can’t stay up too late, I’m a bit tired and I have to get up early tomorrow. You know, a lot of press stuff for the tour.”

“I know, we’ll just sleep. I want you to feel good tomorrow.” Chris said. “If you want, I’ll run you a bath later, so you can relax,” before I get to respond, a brown-haired woman tapped Chris on his shoulder and greeted him.

“My oh my, Evans! What are you doing here?” she beamed at him, and Chris smiled back in response. Her hair falls down to her back, and she flashed a bright pearly white smile. To me, she looked intimidating due to the strong features of her face.

“Tori, oh my God, how are you?” he said as he got off his stool to hug her. Chris hugged her tightly, so I assumed that she is someone really close to him. “I’m visiting Ali – by the way, Ali, this is my friend Tori, she was my classmate before,” he explained as he placed a hand on my lap.

“Alison Bella,” I said and reached out for a handshake. Tori looked at Chris as if she’s asking for a confirmation of what was my relationship with Chris. She softly shook my hand and smiled. “I’m his girlfriend,” I quickly added. Chris’ and my eyes met, and I smiled softly at him. Chris grinned like he just won the jackpot.

Tori turned to Chris and playfully tapped on his arm. “You better behave yourself, Evans.” She teased. “I’m a big fan, by the way.” She said and placed her hand on my shoulder. “Anyway, I gotta go. I might be disturbing you guys, and it’s already late. I just wanted to say hi.” She smiled at the both of us. She gave Chris another hug and said goodbye. “Bye, Chris,” she smiled and then turned to me before walking away, “Bye, Alison.”

Well that was random,” I muttered and took another sip of my drink. I felt awkward after the encounter with Tori. _Am I jealous? No, am I crazy?! She’s his friend_. _She’s just his friend_.

“So, I’m your boyfriend, huh?” Chris’ voice snapped me from my internal monologue. He has a smirk on his face.

“Stop teasing, Chris. I might take it back.” I joked. Chris chuckled and sipped his drink.

“But you meant it?” he asked.

“Yeah, like where would this be going right?” I said matter-of-factly. “We’re just headed to that direction.” Chris’ face lit up. “I just wanted things to be taken slowly ‘cause y’know what happened to me and my ex before. It was scary to let myself go and let myself feel but I don’t know with you it’s so easy.” I began pouring out my emotions. “Being away from you, touring and all, made me realize that I should just take the leap.” I took a deep breath and said wholeheartedly, “I just wanted to be with you.”

“You know, the first time I saw you, I was really taken aback. Then as we got closer, I just fell deeper and deeper for you. I’m drawn to you. I just wanted to be with you, even if I have to wait… remember that I will.” Chris said and planted a kiss on my forehead. I looked at him with his bright blue eyes melting my heart. He looks like the definition of a perfect boyfriend. _God, I’m lucky._ “I know, you’re probably really tired now, I can see it in your eyes.”

“Or I’m just a little drunk.” I joked, and he chuckled in response. But Chris was right, my eyelids felt heavy and my body was already looking for the nearest surface to rest on.

“Let’s go to bed,” Chris offered and helped me off my seat. My phone beeped in my pocket and I checked who it was. It was Brandon, my manager.

**_You were great earlier. I’m so proud of you. We have a meeting tomorrow morning. Don’t be late._ **

After sliding my phone down to my pocket. Chris and I went to my hotel room to sleep. As promised he ran me a bath, but he left me alone which I appreciated. He let me relax by myself and cuddled me to sleep in bed. At that moment I knew, this is what I want for the rest of my life.


	6. Keep It A Secret

I woke up from the sound of my phone ringing. I reach for my phone that was on the nightstand beside me. Still with my eyes shut, I answered the call.

“Ali, wake up. Brett and I will come over to your room at 8:30,” Joelle would call me in the morning or either come to my room to wake me up since I’m a heavy sleeper. I just hummed in response and slowly fluttered my eyes open. I shifted to my side to face Chris as I keep on listening to Joelle. “And the meeting with Brandon will be over breakfast.” _Ah yes, the meeting with Brandon. How could I forget?_ I stared at Chris who is still fast asleep. His long eyelashes “You have a busy day, hun. I know you still want to spend your day with Mr. America, but we have a busy day.”

“I know Joelle,” I whispered, “but let’s kick him out after breakfast, is that okay?” I joked, and Joelle’s chuckle filled my ear.

“Of course, Ali.” Joelle responded. She was more than my assistant, she was my bestfriend. She looks after me and pulls me up when I’m down. I trust her with my whole life and I am grateful that I have her. Even when all the showbiz thing becomes really difficult, she’s always there to support me.

“I left Mr. America his bag last night in your room, did ya’ll see it?” she asked. I sat up and slowly scanned the room. I found a blue duffle bag on the floor at the left side of the bed.

“Yeah, I saw it.” I answered. Chris moaned as he woke up stretching his arms. “I’m going to get ready, Jo. See you later.” As I ended the call, Chris pulled me back into his arms. My back was against his chest as his arms are around my waist.

“Good morning, babe.” He husked and kissed my neck. I can feel his growing erection as he nudged it closer to my ass. I moaned softly as Chris kissed and sucked on my neck. I really wanted to give in, but I have a busy day today. It’s already 7:15 and Joelle and Brett will come over later.

“I need to get ready,” I said softly as I keep myself from giving in.

“I know,” Chris whispered as he pulled down my robe from my right shoulder. His lips found its way to my shoulder and his hands moved up to my breast. _Oh God, I can’t say no to this. I don’t wanna say no_. I had a quick idea and turned my head and looked back at Chris.

 “Join me in the shower.” I commanded. Chris immediately carried me to the bathroom. He gently put me down in the middle of the bathroom and took off his robe. I took off my robe and my panties and moved closer to Chris to kiss him deeply. Our tongues danced as our kiss deepen. I tugged on his bottom lip and smirked as our lips parted. I walked to the shower and turned on the water. The warm water rained how my hair and to my back.

“You’re beautiful.” He muttered and took off his boxers. Chris’ lips crashed into mine. I held his membrane in my hand as I gently moved my hand along his length. Chris gently pushed me against the tiled wall and rubbed my folds with his fingers.

“I want you in me now, baby.” I pleaded for him. Chris pulled me up and wrapped my legs around his waist. He entered me slowly and I cried out his name. Chris filled me and stretched my walls. “Oh yes, Chris. Gently.” I whimpered. He thrusted slowly making sure I felt every inch of him. His membrane moved slowly in and out of me.

“Come on baby, feel it all in.” he said as he thrusted deeper. I moaned louder, and my voice echoed in the room. Every inch of him is inside me, I feel like on heaven. I can feel my walls throb as a wave of orgasm filled my body. I dug my nails in Chris’ back as I cried out in pleasure.

“Faster, baby. Faster.” I pleaded, and Chris immediately complied. He changed to a faster pace, still carrying me in his arms. I rested my head on his shoulder as he continues to pound in me. He was hitting the right spots sending me to an abyss of ecstasy. The warm water showering down just added more sensation to our bodies. Chris pulled out and put me down for me to stand up.

“Turn around,” He commanded, and I followed willingly. He held my arms together at my back and entered me from behind. He pounded me hard and slow which led my moans to be just louder. I can hear Chris groaning as he come close to his peak. “Oh fuck,” Chris muttered as he pulled out and loaded himself on my ass. He spanks me and turns me to face him. “Now, let’s get you cleaned.”

***

Just in time, Joelle and Brett came to help me get ready. Brett straightened my curly hair that falls up to my back and proceeded to do my makeup. Chris helped Joelle as she packed my stuff. He would also help Brett to hold chunks of my hair when he was styling it. Around 9am, Brandon came in with room service for our breakfast. Joelle, Brett, Brandon, Chris and I sat together on the circular dining table in my room. I was still wearing a cotton robe above my mustard sleeveless bodysuit and black high waisted pants. I prepared myself for another day of meetings, press, appearances and other promotional work for my tour.

“Ali, I have to talk to you about something important,” he said as he typed on his Macbook while sipping on some coffee. “You too Chris, you need to pay attention.” My heartbeat immediately pounded faster. _Oh shit, I’m in trouble_. He placed his cup of coffee on the table and turned the Macbook to our direction. A screenshot of a gossip website article flashed in front of my eyes. The headline made my blood boil. _‘Alison Bella gets a little taste of Captain America’_. The article also included a photo of Chris and I at the hotel bar kissing.

“Ah shit,” I muttered to myself as I took a sip of my tea. Brandon was very meticulous of how I was perceived by the public eye. Everything to him is business. “I don’t care if the public knows about us,” I said.

“Yeah, it’s kinda bound to happen, right?” Chris added.

Brandon rolled his eyes and his calm tone changed. “But Ali, it’s on a gossip website. Do you see how ridiculous that is?” He sighed, and I kept my head down. It was hard to argue with Brandon, he would always make sure that he’ll get his way. I just quiet down and let him, he never made me do things that were outrageous. He’s just really pushy. “Don’t worry, I made the calls for it to be taken down. I just want the two of you to be aware that we don’t want this.” I looked at Chris who’s sternly staring at Brandon. His arms are folded on his chest. He was quiet, but his body language was tense. “If you guys want to make it public, let’s do it at and awards show or something but for now we gotta keep it a secret, okay?”

“Why do we need it to be a secret? Ali doesn’t care, I don’t care.” Chris’ stern voice said what was on my mind. I pursed my lips together as I prepare myself for Brandon’s outburst.

“Chris, if you really care about Ali, just play along. Her priority right now is her career, okay?” Brandon was surprisingly calm. Chris looked back at me and I just held his hand. _I’m sorry._ My heart cried out for him. I didn’t want him to be involved in this mess but since we are both in Hollywood, I guess it is the price we have to pay. I just want our relationship to be special and not some tabloid story. Chris eyes were soft as he looked at me, as if he understood me. He gave me a soft smile reassuring me that we’ll be okay.

“Alright, I understand.” Chris answered and held my hand tightly.


	7. Sting of Reality

_Sebastian’s POV_

My heart was pounding as I sat alone in my trailer. Today I was not wearing my black Winter Soldier outfit. I was wearing clothes that would make the Winter Soldier blend in since he was supposed to be in a museum. I meditated as I try to ease off the nervousness. My eyes are shut, and I only concentrated on my breathing. Alison’s eyes immediately popped in my head.  He soft brown eyes, her long lashes, and that little beauty mark on the left inner corner of her eye. She makes me calm yet she is the reason why I’m a nervous wreck right now. A knock on the door broke me out of my trance.  I went straight to set; my feet just lead me to one direction. Out of all the people, from the crew, the background actors, only one stood out. _It was her_.

“Sebastian, are you ready?” Joe Russo approached me, and I just nodded in response. Joe started to give me instructions by my attentions was fixated to Ali. She was talking with Anthony Russo, her eyes are wide as she listened to the instructions given to her. “It’s just going to be you and Ali,” Joe’s voice snapped me back to reality. “Are you okay?” he asked me.

“Yeah, I’m good.” I said. Joe and Anthony went back to their chairs. I watch as Alison walked towards me. She flashed a bright smile which was a contrast from her dark outfit, a dark gray jacket, black sweatpants and sneakers.

“Hi Seb, how are you?” She wrapped her arms around my waist and rested her head on my chest. I was distancing myself from her ever since I heard from her brother that things were getting serious between her and Chris. I placed my hand on her head as I hugged her back. _I miss you._ “You were kinda AWOL, are you okay?”

“I’m good,” I answered softly. We unlocked from our embrace and Alison held my hands. “I’m sorry, I was busy. How are you?”

“I’m great, the tour was crazy and now I’m working on an album. Everything’s really crazy, I just want to have a lazy day – let’s have a lazy day, like the old days.” She said and smiled at me. My heart melted as I looked at her. “Y’know, beer, pizza, and Star Wars, or maybe the Godfather, or maybe some horrible ass movies.”

“We’ll do that soon, I promise.” I said. I squeezed her hand before letting go of her hand. I would love to have her hand in mine every day, but I can’t. The world seems to be against us being together the way I want to. Whenever I mustered up the guts to tell her how I feel, she’s unavailable.

It was easy for me to shoot the scene. I was supposed to act as if I was relieved to see her again but there was an underlying pain in our reunion. It was exactly how I was feeling. We only did a few takes and we didn’t mess up that much. Alison would just start to laugh uncontrollably at some takes. After we shot the scene, we were able to have a short break. Ali and I decided to go to her trailer to catch up. Brett and Joelle left to give us some privacy.

“What happened to you last time? I texted you when I came back to the hotel, you didn’t reply.” She asked. “I was worried,” Ali’s voice was sincere, and she pouted at me. _Don’t do that, you know that’s my weakness._

“I forgot,” I wasn’t able to make up an excuse, I can’t just tell her that I have feelings for her. She didn’t ask me more about what happened which relieved me since I didn’t have to make up some stupid excuse.

“Well you owe me a drink, okay? And a lazy day.” She pointed a finger at me and smiled.

“And a lazy day?” I asked her.

“And a lazy day.” She answered.

“So, how’s you and Chris?” I asked and regretted it. I know that her answer will just hurt me. Alison’s mouth formed a huge grin and she rested her head on my shoulder. She immediately became giddy and her cheeks turned red.

“It’s good,” she said before she succumbed to a fit of giggles. Last time I saw her like this is when she told me about her engagement. “He’s a really great guy, my mom met him last week.” As Alison continued on talking about how Chris met her mom when they ran into her while they are having dinner at some restaurant in LA. Her facial expression changed when she said, “It just sucks that Brandon’s forcing me to keep it a secret.” I looked at Alison as she looks down at her hands.

“But you’re happy with him, right?” I asked her.

“Yeah, I’m happy with him,” she nodded her head. “I guess I’ll just bring him to the next event I’ll go to.”

“Well, just always remember that I’ll be ready to beat him up if he messes up,” I placed my arms around her shoulder and pulled her closer to me. Alison rested her head on me and smiled. “As long as your happy, I’m happy for you.”

“I miss you, Seb.” She sighed and wrapped her arms around me. “I miss back then when we’re in New York.”

“If ever you wanted to come over, you can always crash at my place and we can have that lazy day.” I smiled at her. Alison looked up at me with her beautiful brown eyes and it just made me melt. “I miss you too.” I said and kissed her forehead. “I’m sorry if I was distant for a little while, I just had a lot of things in my mind.”

“It’s okay, Seb.” She said softly and hugged me tighter. I kissed her head as I let the moment sink in. Even though she has somebody else in her heart, she still has a special place in my life. We became really close since we both really understand each other. All of a sudden, the door of her trailer opened and revealed Chris.

_Shit._

“Alison?” Chris calmly said. Alison quickly stood up and walked towards Chris. She reached up to him and game him a kiss on his lips as a greeting. I felt a deep sting in my chest. The kiss made it more real to me. I guess I really have to accept that Alison’s heart has someone else.

 

 

_Chris’ POV_

Seeing Alison in Sebastian’s arms made me a little bit of uncomfortable. I understand that they are close but seeing this for the first time threw me off a little bit. Alison kissed me, and I wrapped my hands around her waist. “I see you’re getting comfortable with Seb,” I muttered.

“Well we haven’t seen each other in a long time.” She explained.

“That’s a nice way of catching up.” I involuntarily bitterly whispered. “We’ll talk about this later.” We walked to the couch and sat with Sebastian. I looked at Alison as she sits between Sebastian and I. A wave of jealousy filled me, I just wanted to take Alison right now and make her remember who she belongs to.

“Hey man,” Sebastian said as he shifted on his seat. He reached over for a handshake, a low-five and a fist bump, I played along so there won’t be any issue.

“Are you guys hungry? ‘Cause I’m getting a little hungry.” Alison randomly asked us. I placed my hand on Alison’s lap and I saw Sebastian look at my hand.

“I’ll get some snacks, I have some of those Japanese snacks you like in my trailer.” Sebastian offered. Alison’s demeanor quickly lit up. He quickly stood up and walked to the door. Before going out, Sebastian turned and glanced back to Alison. “Do you want anything else?”

“A Special Strawberry smoothie?” Alison smirked _. Is this some inside joke or something?_

“Ha-ha. Very funny.” Sebastian answered back sarcastically before leaving.

“Thanks, Seb!” Alison called out to Sebastian before he shuts the door. As soon as the door shuts, I pulled Alison to my lap and started kissing her neck. “Chris,” she cooed as I placed deep kisses in her neck. _You’re mine_.

“I see you’re really close with Sebastian, huh?” I whispered in her ear as I touched every curve of her body. “You’re so happy to see him that you forget who you really belong to.” I growled then left a soft bite on her earlobe.

“You got nothing to worry about, babe.” She said as she gently holds my face and kisses my lips. A soft giggle escapes Alison’s mouth. “Are you jealous?” she asked me. _Am I jealous? No, but I just don’t like seeing her that close with Sebastian. I don’t know. Maybe._ I was lost in a big riot of thought as I try to formulate my answer. I can feel Alison sensing my confusion. She gave me a tight hug and said, “It’s just Sebastian, babe. You have nothing to worry about. We were just really close. We go way back and he’s special to me.” Her explanation kind of eased me but it reminded me that Sebastian and Alison spent a lot of time together. They lived together. I can’t help but to overthink of what could have happened before. “What matters is that I love you, okay?” her voice was a song to me that calmed me. Those three words distracted me from my thoughts. _She loves you, man. Get it together_.

“I love you too, babe.” I said. Even though I took off the jealous thoughts in my head, I still want to remind her that she is only mine. “But this doesn’t mean you won’t get punished later.”


	8. An Act of Possession

_Alison’s POV_

Around 7pm, I arrived at the hotel to rest. I still have three more more days of shooting and one of those days is just going to be a scene between Sebastian and I. Chris had to stay a little later set since he still got a lot of scenes to do. I stripped down and took a quick shower to help me relax. I didn’t understand why Chris was acting a little weird earlier with Sebastian. They were friends, and Chris would even tell me about how close they became. As I changed in to my pajamas, my phone rang. I picked up my phone from the nightstand and immediately answered the call.

“Hey, babe.” Chris greeted. “Are you busy?”

“No not really, I’m just getting ready for bed. What’s up?” I said as I crawled to my bed. As I waited for Chris’ response, I heard a soft knock on my door. I stood up and answered the door. It was Chris wearing tight white shirt and blue sweatpants. One of his hands holds a bottle of wine and two wine glasses fitted between his fingers.

“You think I forgot about your punishment?” He smirked. I smirked back at him. His eyes shined a darker hue full of lust and possessiveness. I stepped aside to let him in. His tall frame towered over me as he walked in my room. I gently shut the door and followed him. He sat on the chair next to the circular table near the window. I watched him pour two glasses of wine. “Did you have fun at set today?” he said as he handed me a glass.

“Yeah,” I said as I took a sip and carelessly threw my phone on the bed.

“You had fun with Sebastian?” he sipped from his drink and rested his back on the chair. I walked towards him and sat on his lap facing him.

“You’re really not going to let that go, huh?” I smirked at him and took another sip of wine. I placed my wine glass on the table. I placed my arms around his neck and gave him a peck. “Sebastian is just my friend.”

Chris pulled me in closer and I can feel his growing member against me. “You know, Alison, I never share.” His voice was rich and husky. He runs his hands through my hair and he softly kisses me on my neck. “You are only mine.”

“Baby, I’m only yours.” I replied and gave him a kiss.

“Tie your hair up for me, babe.” He ordered. I quickly stood up and went to my nightstand to look for a hair tie. As soon as I found one, I tied my hair up into a tight ponytail. Chris refilled our drinks and stood up from his chair then handed me my drink. “Drink up.”

“Are you trying to get me drunk, Evans?” I teased as I try to make him forget about the punishment. Chris just rolled his eyes and chuckled. I quietly drank my wine as I waited for Chris to talk. The silence in the room was broken by the sound of my phone ringing. Chris quickly got my phone from my bed and looked at the screen. His lips formed into a small smirk as he stared at the screen of my phone. He looked at me with a dark plan in his mind.

“Answer it,” he said and handed me my phone. It was Sebastian. _Fuck_. I stared at the screen of my phone as it flashed Sebastian’s contact photo. It was a photo of Sebastian when we celebrated his birthday a couple of years ago. I looked at Sebastian’s smiling face smeared with icing as the sound of my ringtone was washed out by my heartbeat. “What are you waiting for? Do you want to get punished more?” Chris’ voice snapped me out of my dumbfounded state. I pressed the answer button on my phone and I slowly placed it by my ear.

“Hello?” I softly said. Chris grabbed the wine glass from my hands and placed the glasses on the table.

“Hey, Ali.” Sebastian breathed.

“What’s up?” I croaked as I watch as Chris slowly walk towards me. Chris frowned as he looked at me. He seemed really pissed especially that Sebastian called me in the middle of the night.

“Nothing, I wanted to go to sleep but I feel unrested.” Sebastian said. Chris started to kiss my neck and wrapped his arms around my waist. I bit my lip as I try not to moan. “Do you wanna go out and grab drinks? My treat.” Sebastian offered.

“Hmmm.” I hummed as I feel Chris’ lips on my neck and his hand on my behind. He slowly knelt down and left a trail of kisses as he went down.

“You can bring Chris if you want.” Sebastian’s voice was a little hesitant. Before I got to answer, Chris slid off my silk pajama pants. His fingers trailed across my panties as he teased my slit. I soft moan escaped my mouth as Chris planted a kiss on my mound over my soaked underwear. I became extra sensitive with every touch that Chris made, he was slow and gentle.

“Just keep talking.” Chris whispered, and pulled down my panties. _Shit_.

“Ali, are you alright?” Sebastian’s voice caught me off guard.

“No – I mean, yeah. I’m okay.” I exhaled as I watch as Chris play with my folds. He inserted a finger in me and I gasped.

“Ali?” Sebastian sounded concerned but was unaware of what is happening to me on the other line.

“I just – I thought I saw s-something.” I stuttered as Chris moved his finger in me. I feel my face heat up as I suffer under Chris’ touch.

“Do you want me to come over?” Sebastian asked.

“No! No!” I pleaded to both Sebastian and Chris. “Don’t come here, I’m good.” I started to breathe heavily as Chris speeds up his rhythm.

“Are you mad at me, Ali?” Sebastian said softly. “Because of you are, then I’m sorry. If it was about earlier, don’t worry I’ll talk to Chris and tell him there’s nothing to worry about.” Sebastian started to apologize. He sounded so sincere, but I just wanted him to shut up since I was going wild because of Chris. As Sebastian goes on with his apology, Chris pushed me down my bed and spread my legs. His soft lips kissed my cunt and I just started to melt. I covered my mouth with my hand to suppress the moans that are trying to escape from me. Sebastian’s voice became white noise to me as Chris treated me as if I was an ice cream on a hot day.

“Fuck,” a loud whimper managed to escape my mouth. Chris inserted two fingers in me and started to pleasure my clit with his mouth.

“Are you crying, Ali?” Sebastian asked me, but I uttered no response. I bite down my lip so hard to keep any sound from coming out, but Chris just keeps on going to make me moan and whimper. After a couple of seconds of silence on the line, Sebastian finally bid goodbye. “I’ll let you rest, Ali. I’ll talk to you in the morning.” He said before ending the call.

“Oh my god!” I cried out as soon as Sebastian hang up. I just let my phone fall from my hands as I let myself focus on the sensation happening to me. I can feel my body building up and nearing to my release. “I’m gonna come,” I moaned as I near my climax. Chris suddenly stopped and stood up from his position. ‘Why did you stop?” I whined.

“You don’t deserve to come,” he said as he pulled down his sweatpants. His member sprung out and he started to pleasure himself. “Open your mouth.” He ordered and pulled on my ponytail. I opened my mouth as I looked up to Chris. He maneuvered my mouth to his length and guided me down. “Faster, put you hands behind your back.” He ordered, and I immediately followed. Chris gripped tighter on my hair and started to move himself. Tears started to fill my eyes as Chris just face fucked me. Chris pulled on my hair as he moved me up and down his length. His breath hitched as he reaches his peak. He released himself in my mouth and pulled me in deeper. I heaved for my breath as he pulled away. I swallowed his load whilst looking at him straight in his bright blue eyes.

Chris pulled up his pants as he catches his breath. He kissed me hard and said, “Never forget that you’re mine.” He just watched me as I weakly dressed up. I was stunned after what happened. I never expected Chris to be like this. I didn’t even see him as the jealous type too. His stern demeanor changed to a softer one as he planted a kiss on my forehead. “Go to rest, babe.” He said, and I adjusted myself on my bed. “Do you want me to stay here with you?” he asked. I just nodded in response as I rested my head on the soft pillows.

Chris crawled on the bed and laid beside me. I snuggled up against him and he wrapped his arms around me. “I love you, baby. Sorry, I got carried away earlier.” He said.

Before Chris started to talk more, I stopped him with a soft kiss on his lips. “It’s okay, babe. I’m tired now, let’s just sleep.” I smiled at him and he just nodded and kissed my nose. “I love you, Chris.” I said and rested my head on his chest.

Tonight was just the start of the chaos.

***

The morning comes, and I immediately got ready for my shoot. Chris had an earlier call time than I did so he had to leave early. I just took a quick shower and headed directly on set. I was offered by the Russos to watch the Chris shoot his fight scene on the highway with Sebastian as I wait for my cue. I was wearing a black leather jacket, gray tank top, distressed jeans and black combat boots as my costume for today. I don’t have to do any fighting in this movie which was a relief for me. I sat beside the directors as I watch with them on their screen.

“Alright guys, take five.” Anthony announced, and Chris immediately ran to me.

I stood up from my seat and gave Chris a hug. “Hi, babe. Good Morning.” I greeted. Chris lead me back to his chair a couple of meters away from me. The makeup artists approached Chris to touch up his makeup, but he asked for us to be alone for a couple of minutes.

“About last night, babe, I really am sorry.” He said as he helped me up on his chair.

“No, Chris. Don’t be sorry, it’s okay.” I said, and I held both of his hands.

“No, Ali. I shouldn’t have been like that. I understand that you and Seb were close for a long time. He’s your friend and he meant a lot to you, so I should respect that. I’m sorry if I let my feelings take the best of me.” He told me as he tightened his grip on my hands. “I just felt a little intimidated because he knew you for a longer time than I did, I just thought that I can’t compete with that.” He confessed.

“Oh baby, you don’t have to compete with Seb.” I said and placed my hands on his cheeks. “He is just my friend, and you are the love of my life. You don’t need to compete, okay? I’m all yours, baby.” Chris smiled as he listened to every word that I said. “I meant every word I said.” I reassured him.

Chris kissed me on my lips forgetting about the place that we are at. We are outside location, not in a studio. The crew and some of the cast are around us. His kiss was deep and intense, as if he is declaring to everyone around us that I was his.

“I love you, Christopher.” I whispered to him as our lips unlocked.

“I love you too,” he responded. Chris kissed me on my cheek and said, “I’ll just go to the bathroom,” before walking away. I can feel some eyes looking at me after what happened. I saw Anthony Russo just smiling and shaking his head in amusement.

“I knew it,” I managed to read his lips as he talked to his brother.

My eyes scanned the area and it was a mix of people smirking after what happened and some just minding their own business. Not to far from me was Sebastian in his Winter Soldier costume, with his mask on his hand. He was looking back at me with a frown on his face. I got up and walked towards him.

“I thought Brandon told you to keep it a secret?” he commented as I got closer to him.

“Fuck Brandon,” I muttered and we both laughed. I looked at Sebastian’s eyes as he placed a hand on my arm.

“I’m really happy for you, Ali. I really am.” He said with the sincerest voice that he can do. I wish I was able to believe him, but his eyes were telling me something else. His eyes were filled with sadness and pain, a total contradiction from what he said.

“Are you okay, Seb?” I asked him, and he just slowly nodded then removed his hand from my arm.

“I’m just a little tired,” he explained. “Don’t worry about me.” He reassured before walking away.

Sebastian was always supportive of my relationships, he never acted this way. _Does he have feelings for me? No, that’s impossible. But he’s acting really weird recently especially when Chris and I started dating. Why is he like this?_ I started to doubt him, I know there is something Sebastian’s not telling me. I just don’t want to jump into conclusions.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you guys liked it. I got a little busy so I didn't get to update that much. Don't worry, I have a lot of plans for this fic though suggestions and comments are always welcome!


	9. Look At Where We Are

After filming my scenes for the second Captain America movie, I went straight back to the studio to do my second album. Chris and I would have Skype dates since he’s back in Cleveland still shooting the movie. I drowned myself in music as I try my best not to miss him. The sound of the piano just became my way to express my feelings for him since he is miles away from me.

_Miles apart and it’s driving me crazy,_

_Your eyes are all that I see,_

_The stars will show that I will be –_

_Waiting, searching, loving only you_

I made sure I gave all my emotions with every word and every note. I closed my eyes as I sang to the microphone. I imagined as if I was singing to Chris. As soon as I finished recording I sat on the couch to rest. My brother and I have been in the studio since 7am and it’s already almost midnight. I took my phone out from my pocket to see if I have any messages from Chris.

“Chris still hasn’t message you yet?” he asked as he takes a swig from his beer. I just shook my head and put my phone down on the coffee table. Adam was finalizing the mix for the song number three that we recorded today. I started to worry since Chris would always call or text me even when he is at work.

“Maybe he was really busy and really tired.” I sighed. “By the way, have you talked to Seb?” I asked my brother, trying to worry about something else. Sebastian was distant again since the last time we talked on set. I tried calling him, but he wouldn’t answer.

“Yeah, we talked yesterday. What’s up?” Adam turn around from his swivel chair and faced me.

“I don’t know, he’s been avoiding me,” I answered him. “Ever since I dated Chris, he’s been acting weird but they’re friends, so I didn’t understand why he’s been avoiding me.”

“Well you’re dating his friend, maybe he’s weirded out or he’s just busy…” Adam suggested.

“I don’t know, man.” I shook my head and stood up from the couch to get a bottle of beer from the mini fridge in the corner of the room.

“And you know Sebastian, he’s like that sometimes.” He explained. “He’s always been protective of you. You know, I’m not saying Chris is a bad guy, I really like him, but maybe because he’s like a new person in your life.”

“But he’s not a jackass like Peter.” I said as I took a sip from my freshly opened beer.

“Yeah,” Adam nodded in response and stood up from his chair. He reached out for a toast and said, “Let’s just hope for the best, right?”

My brother and I spent the next hours in polishing the songs we recorded the whole day. Chris still hasn’t texted or called me yet. 2am rolled in and Adam and I called it a day. As we were cleaning up, we hear a sudden knock on the door. I went and opened the door and it was Chris with a handful of baggage in his hands.

“Hi babe,” Chris smiled as he entered the studio. I jumped up to him and gave him a big hug. “Sorry I didn’t call, I wanted to surprise you.” I looked up to him and his eyes looked really tired.

“I thought you’re still in Cleveland.” I said as I helped him with his bags.

“Well we changed locations and we’ll shoot here in LA this week.” He explained as I lead him to the couch. “So as soon as I got off the plane, I went straight to you.”

“I love you, babe.” I kissed him on the lips. “Well, Adam and I are just cleaning up. You just rest there and then we’ll go home.”

After a couple of minutes Adam helped Chris and I to load his luggage in my car. Adam went and drove off on his own car since he’ll be coming home to the apartment he recently got with Eloise. Chris agreed that he’ll stay at my house for now. As we got in the car, Chris immediately noticed the brown teddy bear on the front passenger’s seat.

“Is this yours?” he asked as he got the stuffed animal and sat on the seat.

“Yeah, why?” I asked him nonchalantly as closed the door.

“Who gave this to you?” he asked.

“Sebastian gave it to me as a congratulatory gift for my tour, he went to the San Diego show.” I explained, and I can see the annoyance in Chris’ face. “He knows I like stuffed toys when I was a kid.” I got the toy from his hands and threw it in the backseat.

“I didn’t know that.” He muttered sarcastically to himself.

“What?” I looked at him as I started the engine.

“I didn’t know that he gave you that.” He said as he tries to avoid eye contact with me.

“I’m sorry, I must’ve forgot about it.” I apologized. I started to drive out of the parking area and Chris just became quiet. It was just the sound of the wheels running on the ground and the ambiance around us. “Are you mad at me? Because if you are, you know, it’s nothing to me. If you want me to throw away the toy, then fine. It doesn’t mean anything, it’s just a congratulatory gift.” I said as I tried to make Chris talk.

“No, don’t throw it away. it just annoys me that you’re close—”

“What I can’t have friends?” I snapped at him.

“No, it’s just you guys are really close, and I saw how Sebastian looks at you and how he talked about you before.”  He explained. “Why are you all defensive?”

“Because you always act like you don’t believe me! How many times do I have to tell you, Chris? We are just friends. If he has feelings for me, I don’t care, we are just friends.” I was starting to get annoyed. “Don’t you trust me?”

“I do but I can’t help to be jealous, you had a whole life with him.” He said.

“We were just roommates! It’s not like we dated!” I raised my voice at him because I was getting really frustrated. “We were just roommates. In fact, we lived in three-bedroom apartment in Lower Manhattan – quite spacious actually. What else do you wanna know?” I burst out.

Chris did not answer, and it was dead silence between us as we drive back to my house. The short drive felt like it lasted for hours. I focused myself on driving as soon as I parked the car on the driveway of my house, Chris held my hand.

“Babe, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have acted that way. It was stupid of me. I was a little insecure and it was really childish of me to act so possessive. I just really want you to be for myself because you’re really important to me. I love you, Ali. So much.” He apologized. “I get so anxious that I’ll mess this up, do something idiotic and you’ll run off with someone else.”

“Chris,” I sighed, and I faced him. “Don’t be anxious baby, we’ll be okay. I love you. I won’t run, I’ll always be here.” Chris just nodded and kissed me. Since it was already really late, Chris and I just unloaded his luggage, left it in my room and went straight to bed.

***

Our relationship kept going stronger, it was easy for us to keep things quiet since we were both busy. He would visit me in the studio or I would visit him on set. We would go out on dinner dates, but we were lucky that we haven’t been spotted by the paparazzi or by fans. We were kind of domestic, since we spent most of our free times at home just relaxing, binge-watching, playing music, or cooking. Chris would even sometimes help me in writing music for my album.

Sebastian on the other hand was still a little distant. We would talk sometimes and catch up on what’s happening in our lives. He said that he’s dating a girl now. I still haven’t met her, but he said she’s somebody he met a while back. He sounded happy when he was talking about her and I felt happy for him.

It was the night of the Winter Soldier premiere and I was initially not going to keep my cameo a secret, but Chris wanted to me to be his date. Brandon finally let me go out in public with Chris, he thinks that it is a good move that we would go to the premiere together. It still annoyed me that everything has to be business though Chris and I just ignore him whenever he tries to control us.

Chris and I arrived at the El Capitan Theatre, and the sea of fans overwhelmed me when I stepped on the red carpet. I immediately turned on my extra playfulness to compensate with my nervousness. I was wearing a short form fitting baby blue dress to somewhat match Chris’ navy blue suit. I held on to Chris’ arms as we walked down the red carpet. I would wave at the fans and smile at everyone.

I would let Chris do his interviews alone since we would avoid the awkward “are you dating?” questions. While waiting for Chris to finish an interview, I felt a hand on my waist.  It was Sebastian in an all black suit. He greeted me with a tight hug and a kiss on my cheek.

“Ali, I missed you.” He said. “I’m sorry if I was acting weird before, I was afraid that it’ll be like Peter all over again – but hey, we’re talking about Chris, he’s a good man.” It was a relief to hear those words from him.

“It’s okay, Seb. Anyway, how’s your girlfriend? Did you bring her here?” I asked him.

“No, I like to keep in on the DL, for now.” He answered.

“Well, I look forward to meet her soon.” I said. Finally, we were back where we were always at. Both of us have our own relationships and supporting each other.

“Seems like you guys are finally going public.” he commented.

“Yeah, but we’re not going to make a huge deal about it. We kinda got tired of hiding so we agreed to slowly let the people know.” I explained. “Plus, it feels kinda nice to be shown off.”

“I’m pretty sure any man, you know, that’s dating you would gladly show you off. I mean, come on Ali! Look at you!” he beamed as he motioned to my dress. “I don’t know how you do it, man. You always look better and better.” Now Sebastian’s starting to sound like the Sebastian I knew.

“Well you look great tonight, too. Real sexy.” I said because I know he’ll immediately blush. Sebastian giggled uncontrollably while looking down on the floor. “For real, Seb. You look great and I’m so proud of you. The movie’s fucking named after you.”

“Thanks, Ali.” He smiled. “I’m proud of you too, you know. Your career’s just getting bigger and bigger. I remember back then when you would write songs at midnight and wake me and Adam.”

“Oh God, I’m sorry.” I laughed.

“But it’s all worth it. To see you where you are right now with your career… and your love life.” Sebastian cooed. “I really am happy for you.”

Chris walked towards us after finishing his interview. He greeted Sebastian with a hug then he placed a hand on my waist. “Hey man, you look great tonight!” Chris patted Sebastian’s shoulder. “You excited?”

“Yeah, it feels all surreal to me still.” Sebastian shook his head in disbelief. “Feels like a dream.”

“I’m proud of you, guys.” I can’t help but to join in their conversation. I reached up to the both of them and gave them a hug. My best friend and the love of my life both in my arms. I was happy, ecstatic even. We were interrupted by one of the ushers telling us that we must go in the theater. Both of them offered their arms for me to hold on to and I reached for the both of them.

“I love you, babe.” I smiled at Chris who’s on my left as the three of us walked towards the theater.

“I love you too.” he smiled back and kissed my forehead. It was all finally okay. Chris wasn’t jealous of Sebastian anymore. Sebastian doesn’t walk out on me when Chris is with me. It was all good. Or so I thought. I looked up at Sebastian and he was looking at me with that sad smile and he mouthed to me something I’ve heard from him a million times but tonight it struck differently.

“I love you.”


	10. Step Back

_Sebastian’s POV_

I felt my body freeze after I realize that I just said. Somehow it was like my heart was the one who spoke for me. Those three words we not unusual between us. Ali would say it to me whenever I bought her pizza. I would tell it to her whenever she would make me a hearty breakfast when I’m hungover. I can’t be feeling this way towards Alison. It is wrong. We both have our own relationships. Mine being less serious than hers but still it doesn’t make it okay for me to feel this way.

“Sebastian, you okay?” Chris asked me. I just realized that I stopped in my tracks. I just shook my head and continued walking with them. I told myself that I wouldn’t interfere with their relationship, I don’t want to put her in that situation.

When we were seated in our seats, I tried my best to keep myself focus on the premiere and put my “work” face on. Alison and Chris were seated a few chairs away from me. I watch as Chris kissed her on her forehead. Alison looked happier than ever. She was glowing, and she looked more beautiful than ever. I didn’t want to ruin it all. I didn’t want to be selfish. When the movie started I tried my best to focus on the movie, but I can’t help but to sneak glances at her. The dimmed lights and the flashes from the screen accentuated her features. I wasn’t able to focus at the movie at all, I was just contemplating how to deal with my feelings. I can’t keep being close with Alison and I can’t stand to be away from her. When the movie ended, I made it a mission to talk to Alison in private at the after party.

 

_Alison’s POV_

It was getting exhausting for me with all of the pictures and mingling. I wasn’t really a person who enjoys being in large crowds, so I was just clinging on Chris’ arms and smiling along with everyone. I noticed that Sebastian was avoiding me again. Whenever I would look at him, he would look away. I would touch him on his arm, but he would slowly move away. After a photo with Chris, Anthony and Sebastian, I excused myself and went to the bar. Chris insisted to accompany me, but I told him that I’d prefer to stay alone for a while. I sat on the stool as I waited for my drink. With the stress of being an introvert in a party mixed with the confusion because of Sebastian’s sudden coldness, it made me so frustrated. One moment I was so happy for both Chris and Sebastian, and now I’m puzzled and overthinking why Sebastian’s acting this way.  

“You okay?” the bartender asked me as I rested my frowning face on my palm. He smiles as he slowly placed my drink in front of me. I just shook my head and exhaled sharply.

“A lot is happening right now and it’s just really frustrating.” I answered as I took a sip of my drink.

“Well I’m here all night, just say what drink it is, and I’ll make it for you.” He winked before walking away to tend to the other people at the bar.

“I see that bartenders are still hitting on you.” Sebastian whispered in my ear before sitting on the stool beside me. I roll my eyes at him to show him how annoyed at him. I didn’t know if I wanted to punch him or talk to him.

“You’re such a dick, Sebastian.” I groaned at him. Sebastian looked shocked at my little outburst. “We were okay then you were suddenly avoiding me earlier. What’s really up, Sebastian?” I gulped down my drink. Sebastian stood up and held both of my wrists.

“I’m sorry, Ali. I’m really sorry.” Sebastian looked down on to the floor as he shook his head. He took a deep breath and looked around the room for the words he wanted to say.

“You know you can talk about it to me.” I exhaled. I looked at Sebastian as his face and he looked like he had a million of thoughts running around in his head.

“Come, let’s talk.” Sebastian helped me off the stool. He led me to a small hallway away from the noise of the after party. Sebastian and I stood in the little dim hallway facing each other. Half of his face was only lit up, but his eyes shined through.

“Hey,” I brushed Sebastian’s arm and held his hands. “Talk to me. We’re friends, right?” I reminded him. Sebastian was still quiet, and he still seems to find the words he wants to say. “Are you mad at me?” I asked to help him start to talk.

“No, I’m not mad at you.” He answered quickly. He took a deep breath and closed his eyes. “I’m mad at myself. I let myself feel things that I should be feeling.”

“What do you mean?” I looked deeper at Sebastian. When he opened his eyes, he looked at me with water forming in his eyes. My heart sunk at the sight.

“I’m falling for you, Ali. And I know that I shouldn’t be.” Sebastian sputtered. I stepped back as I let Sebastian pour out his feelings. “I was supposed to tell you when I came to your San Diego show but then you told me about Chris – you know it doesn’t matter.”

“I’m sorry, Seb.” I didn’t know how to react. I can’t believe how oblivious I was of how Sebastian felt for me. Chris’ jealously made deeper sense to me and I finally understood why Sebastian’s distant.

“Don’t be, Ali. It’s not your fault.” Sebastian tightened his grip on my hands. “It’s me, I shouldn’t have let myself feel that way to you. I know we are friends – we are just friends, and you’re with Chris. I tried fighting it, Ali. I swear I did but I can’t.” His desperation was evident in his eyes. He gulped back his tears as he tried to contain his emotions. “I know that this won’t stop if I’m around you.”

“W-what do you mean?” I stuttered. I don’t like where this is going. I hope that my gut feeling was wrong.

Sebastian closed his eyes and took a deep breath before continuing, “If I’ll stay close to you, my feelings would get more intense then I’m afraid that it’ll come to a point that I’ll get in the way between you and Chris. I see you with him and I see that you’re happy with him. I don’t want to take that away from you. I would hate myself if I did.”

I feel a lump form in my throat as I listened to Sebastian. I can’t believe what he was saying. “Sebastian, I don’t understand.” A huge ball of emotion was taking over me. A mix of anger, hurt, frustration, and confusion.

“Ali,” he breathed and placed his hand on my face. Suddenly felt my tears flow down my face and Sebastian quickly wiped it with his thumb. “I just need some time off, I think I need to separate myself from you for a while. I know that you’ll hate me if I just keep on distancing myself from you without telling you why, and I don’t want that.” His voice rasped as he finished his sentence. It sounded like the words pained him when he uttered them. “I just want you to be happy.” _But I won’t be happy knowing that you’re avoiding me_. I sobbed and held Sebastian’s hands. “We’re still going to be friends, it’s just I’ll step back a little bit. You know me, Ali, sometimes when I fall for a girl, I can get too intense, and I can be stupid.” Sebastian said matter-of-factly.

“Just don’t step back too far, I still need you.” I told him, and he smiled bitterly. He planted a kiss on my forehead and gave me a tight hug.

“Promise me that’ll you have fun tonight, okay?” he whispered in my ear.

“I will,” I answered back to him. When we unlocked, I watched as Sebastian slowly walked away from me into the light of the party. I wanted to run after him and pull him back. I wanted to make him stay but I know it wouldn’t be the right thing to do. I know keeping him close to me would jeopardize our friendship and I don’t want to put him in a position that he’d have to hide his feelings to the point where it would consume him. I took a deep breath and wiped the tears off the sides of my eyes. I made sure I was composed before walking back to the party. I didn’t want anyone to know what happened, plus I still haven’t digested what really happened. I walked quickly back to the bar and ordered a stronger drink.

“I think you need this.” The bartender from earlier gave me some napkins. He pointed his finger to the corner of his eye. I didn’t realize that my eyes were still teary. Before he got to talk to me again, he got multiple orders and tended to them. I stared down on my drink as I was deafened by the noise of the party. I felt empty.

“Hey babe, you okay?” Chris’ voice snapped me out of my quietness. Chris noticed my eyes and his bright smile turned to a look of concern. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing, nothing… I was just… I was just getting a little emotional. You know, things are so different a few years ago.” I lied. I reached out to Chris and kissed him on his lips before hugging him tightly. I didn’t want Chris to know about what happened. Not now. “I’m just really happy.”

 

_Sebastian’s POV_

It was hard to walk away from Alison. I can hear her sniffles fading away as I walked back to the noise of the people having fun. I regretted every word I said, I wanted to walk back and take it all back from her. _I could just live my life secretly falling for her right?_ I shook my head at that thought. I would die of guilt knowing that I have to hide something from her. I walked towards Anthony as he talked to some of our co-stars. I started to join the conversation with the group to keep my mind off of Alison. I scanned the room and I saw Alison kissing Chris. It crushed me, but I just kept looking. I needed to be able to numb the pain, I need to be able to move on. I needed to do what I did. I have a girlfriend, even it’s not serious, it would be wrong if I’m still falling for someone else.

“Crazy, right?” Anthony nudged at me and pointed at Chris and Alison who are now hugging.

I need to move on.


End file.
